Anyone who knows me knows that I love anything that gets my adrenaline going. I have been skydiving. I love fast cars and motorcycles. I love taking care of trauma patients in the ER. And I absolutely love roller coasters.
However, this roller coaster I'm on right now, I'm not such a big fan. A couple of weeks ago if you asked me how I had been feeling recently, I would've said "pretty good, actually." My pain was under control, my energy levels were up (at least enough to at least somewhat enjoy my day), and my muscle weakness seemed to be getting better. I was hardly using my wheelchair around the house. There were days that I would realize at 7 o'clock at night that I hadn't taken any pain meds that day. I thought, "I might actually be on the upswing!" I, unfortunately, got my hopes up.
So, like any roller coaster, what goes up, must go down. That's normally the part I love. Yeah... not so much anymore. For the last week and a half I have felt Awful (yes, with a capital "A"). I have been using my wheelchair all the time, if I even have the energy to get out of bed in the first place. My GI system is running amok. I have had a killer migraine today. Luckily my migraine medicine helped it, but now every muscle in my body hurts worse than in a long time. My muscles are so weak that I was struggling to walk last night. I was back to holding on to walls as I walked because of the fear of falling and/or my legs giving out any second. The only reason I have the energy to type this is because the only thing that's moving is my fingers as my arms are completely propped up by pillows.
What is up with this roller coaster crap? I am so thankful for the couple of weeks in which I felt better. However, I got my hopes up. It's almost like it makes it harder that I'm feeling bad now.
|Two weeks ago, this was me.|
|Now this is me... |
but it's not near as much fun as the real thing.
|Then again, this might be more like it.|